Oiy! Today has been a STRUGGLE! Not physically, but mentally, emotionally & spiritually. I can’t seem to get ahead no matter how fast I drive. I feel like there’s hundreds of pounds weighing me down, dragging me through this COLD, FRESH, WHITE, FLUFFY SNOW that seems to have overtaken the scenery. I feel like crud☹ on the inside about everything! THAT’S NOT ME! Hold up! Where’s the owner’s manual? What could be wrong? Is it the map? Did I take a wrong turn? WHAT? WHAT? Please send help!
I’m in this constant tug-of-war with myself about being a good parent, a good person. I never seem to measure up to MY OWN standards. Do YOU do this? I can’t be the ONLY one who’s overly critical of themselves. I feel like I’ve failed. I haven’t accomplished ANYTHING! I can’t even provide for my family by myself.
And then I begin to question God. I mean, is THIS REALLY ALL He had in his “plan” for me? Is this prospering? WHAT KIND OF A FUTURE could this possibly lead to? Y’all, it freaks me out. I’m not going to lie and say I never stress and that I never question my circumstances, because honestly, I DO! If YOU don’t, please, I need LESSONS🤣
I’m still learning and looking for the perfect way that works FOR ME to sit in peace and stay in faith through ALL that life throws my way- I’m pretty sure it’s something that I’ll be fine tuning the rest of my life, and I guess that’s ok.
And if today is STRUGGLE, well SO BE IT! I will be ALL the stronger tomorrow because I persevered TODAY! Embrace the struggle in the most awkward hug you’ve EVER given and ROCK God’s plan for your future!